Episode 26

Hidimba’s love with Bhima -the birth of Ghatotkacha[i]

This is the story of Hidamba’s love with Bhima, the second in line of Pandavas and the consequent birth of one of the greatest warriors of Kurukshetra battle, Ghatotkacha. The story discusses ‘kama’ of Hidimba and elaborates that love is not a taboo in our ancient India. ‘Kama’ associated with dharma is the resplendence of God itself. Then why are certain restrictions on love making for couples? What is dharmic love and how it is different from adharmic love? For details read the story below.

The Story

In the aftermath of the burning of the Laksha Griha (Lak house), Pandavas hastened to leave the place and on the same night they left the place and reached a faraway forest. It was a dark night and the forest was dense and the Pandavas found it difficult to tread on the path with vigor.  Dharmaraja requested Bhima to carry them all (Adi Parva 149.25) and he readily obliged. He carried his mother and other four brothers and that was his strength.

On reaching the forest, Bhima made them sleep below a tree and guarded them in the night. What a fateful night? The powerful kings who were destined to rule the world were ordained to sleep on the floor of the forest. The queen of Pandu Maharaj and the aunt of Lord Krishna, Kunti was not spared by the fate and she had to sleep on the floor with quenching thirst. Bhima was at once sorrowful and scolding the evil Kauravas.

The forest was the abode of a powerful Asura, Hidimbasura. He sensed the human entry into the forest by the power of smell and instantaneously yearned to have a feast of human flesh. He ordered his sister Hidimba to kill and collect the bodies of those humans.

Hidimba reached the spot where Bhima was guarding his mother and brothers. The mighty Bhima was standing majestically and his manly maneuver made her mad. 

अयं श्यामो महाबाहु: सिंहस्कन्दो महा द्युतिः।

कम्बुग्रीवः पुष्कराक्ष: भर्ता युक्तो भवेन्मम।। (ayaṃ śyāmo mahābāhu: siṃhaskando mahā dyutiḥ। kambugrīvaḥ puṣkarākṣa: bhartā yukto bhavenmama।।)- (Adi Parva 151.18) – ‘He was a man with broad shoulders, dark brown in complexion, thick muscles of a mighty lion, cone like broad neck, broad eyes and resplendent aura – oh! Yes I am blessed if he were to be my husband’, Hidimba thought.

Why should she follow the dictates of her ‘cruel’ brother? She might get happiness by the feast of their flesh but that would be ephemeral. If she marries the man, that would fetch permanent happiness (Adi Parva 151- 19, 20). She, being a lady with magical powers, turned herself into a beautiful damsel and reached Bhima with blushes on her cheeks and smiles on the lips. She told gently that she was deputed by her brother Hidimbasura to kill all of them. ‘But on seeing you, I could not control my senses. I offer myself to you for service’. She offered to rescue Bhima from the imminent danger and escort him to dense caves and forests where they could enjoy the coital bliss (अतुलामाप्नुहि प्रीतं तत्र तत्र मया सह[ii] - atulāmāpnuhi prītaṃ tatra tatra mayā saha)

Bhima was guarding his brother and how can he leave them to the mercy of a cruel demon and disappear with a damsel? He was no way inferior in strength to anyone including gods and how dare a demon lay his hand on his brothers? He further told, ‘The man who is sleeping here is my elder brother and he is not married yet. How can I transgress dharma and attract the epithet of PARIVETTA[iii] in the eyes of the society?’ So he asked Hidimba to fetch her brother for a duel.

While the discussion was going on, the restless demon was growing impatient and he reached the spot and saw his sister decked with ornaments and conversing with an unknown man. His anger knew no bounds and decided to devour his own sister and all the Pandavas.

Hidimba got frightened at the deadly approach of her brother from a long distance and alerted Bhima to wake all his brothers so that she could carry all of them to unknown destination fast. But Bhima was a man of mighty energy and loved fighting with demons and beasts. With one gulp, he caught hold of Hidimbasura and, as a lion dragging a deer; he dragged him to a distant location in order not to disturb the sleep of his mother and brothers. The duel was cruel with each of them plucking the trees from the roots, rocks from the crust and throwing at each other.

The sounds of fury pierced the peaceful sleep of Pandavas. They woke up and knew what was happening from the polite Hidimba. The dusk was about to dawn and Pandavas knew that the strength of demons (Asuras) grow with each stroke of a second. Arjuna alerted Bhima to finish the demon before it could become totally dark. Bhima, the son of powerful Vayu (God of wind), with all the strength at his command, beat the demon with a deadly stroke and broke his back into pieces. The demon screamed and breathed his last.

Everyone praised Bhima and then they started moving towards a town nearby. Hidimba followed with heart filled with anxiousness. She saw the nonchalant Bhima moving without bothering to look at her. From the back, she pleaded to do justice to her but Bhima told, ‘You might turn to be a deceiver and never forget the revenge. It is better you should follow your brother (to die immediately)[iv]

But Dharmaraja interviened and prevented Bhima from killing her. ‘It is sin to kill a woman’, he advised. Then Hidimba turned towards Kunti and Dharmaraja and pleaded for justice. Addressing Kunti she told, ‘Oh lady! You know how the ladies suffer from the pain of Love. I am bitten by the arrows of Love and suffering like this. I have left my people and followed this man. If rejected, the alternative is death and death only to me’, she wept bitterly.

She further argued, ‘Please permit for our marriage. I shall take him to celestial spots on earth, freely roam around for some days and come back with him to your place. Forever I shall help you in all your difficulties and carry all of you to any place of your choice at whatever time’. ‘To obviate the imminent dangers, and to preserve the lives, one should plan a scheme of action. People treading on the path never fail to plan their future’[v].

Hidimba continued, ‘I have a divine vision by which I can foresee the future events. Please accept me into your family and it is dharma for you. Desisting a lady does not deserve to be a dharma.

पुण्यं प्राणान् धारयति पुण्यं प्राणदमुच्यते।

 येनं येनाचरेद्धर्मं तस्मिन् गर्हा न विद्यते।। - puṇyaṃ prāṇān dhārayati puṇyaṃ prāṇadamucyate। yenaṃ yenācareddharmaṃ tasmin garhā na vidyate।।[vi]. The meritorious deeds that men do sustain their lives. So the merit or punya is known as प्राणदं. One should adhere to any plan that helps in the path of dharma sadhana’.

Kunti was pleased by the dharmic talk of Hidimba and asked Dharmaraja to ponder over and take a decision for marrying her to Bhima. Dharmaraja thought for a while and agreed that Hidimba was right. He agreed for the marriage but with a condition.

‘You can roam around with Bhima in day time but you should bring him back by night’[vii]. Hidimba politely agreed.

Kunti turned towards Bhima and told, ‘Oh my dear son! This lady has loved you sincerely and in a righteous way she has approached me. Do not argue anymore and take her hand for the sake of dharma and bless her with a son’. Bhima consented and turning towards Hidimba he told, ‘I shall be with you till you give birth to a son[viii]. Hidimba agreed happily to the proposition.

Hidimba took out Bhima to selected beautiful spots on earth- the flowery gardens, the raving beaches, the deep ridges, the crisp sandy banks, the mountain peaks, the dark clouds, and the celestial fountains and forgot the days and seasons under the embrace Bhima’s broad shoulders. Ultimately she conceived and delivered a male baby who, though a child, was resplendent with youth[ix]. He had a big mouth, fearful eyes, long ears, ejected nose, red lips and above all he had a roaring voice. He was an Asura like her uncle but pious like her mother. Since the hair on his head was erect, the parents named him as Ghatotkacha. Being an Asura, he attained youth and prostrated before all Pandavas with respect. Ghatotkacha and Hidimba promised to help Pandavas whenever it is needed and left to unknown destination.

A short analysis of the story

This is one of the romantic love stories of Mahabharata, though the love is one-sided. Hidimba could not sustain and control her senses on seeing Bhima. On the very first sight, she decided to marry him and wondered how her luck would be if at all he were to be her husband. She wanted to design her heaven in his lap. She pleaded with Bhima to take her hand and when she failed to convince him appealed to the elders for doing justice. She was not angry with Bhima.  Normally, ‘Kama’ (desire) when not realized, will result into ‘krodha’ (anger) and krodha leads to sammoha (disillusion). Gita explains:

सङ्गात्सञ्जायते काम: कामात्क्रोधोऽभिजायते-

‘saṅgātsañjāyate kāma: kāmātkrodho'bhijāyate’ (Gita 2.62)

क्रोधाद्भवति सम्मोह: सम्मोहात्स्मृतिविभ्रम: -

krodhādbhavati sammoha: sammohātsmṛtivibhrama: - (Gita 2.63)

But the desire of Hidimba, though appears lustful, is genuine. For her, death is the only alternative if her request was denied. For understanding the story in a better way, let us compare the approach of Hidimba with that of Surpanakha in Ramayana very briefly (since Surpanakha story will be discussed elaborately in the stories of Ramayana in due course of time).  Surpanakha approached Rama, a person who was already married and his wife was very much with him at the time of her approach. She was attracted by Rama. But when Rama asked her to approach Lakshmana, she approached him and again approached Rama on the advice of Lakshmana. She tried to devour Sita thinking that she was the obstacle for her marriage with Rama. It is a clear case of lust; and a true love can be with one person and one person alone. Wavering love is lust which is not in tune with dharma. Hindu scriptures never say that love is taboo and something to be wrapped under the carpet. A genuine love is well permitted and again in Gita we come across a reference where the Lord Krishna says that the love not associated with adharma was precisely His resplendence.

धर्माविरुद्धो भूतेषु कामोऽस्मि भरतर्षभ - dharmāviruddho bhūteṣu kāmo'smi bharatarṣabha ( Gita 7.11) – I am the Love in beings that is unassociated with adharma.

Hidimba was approaching an unmarried man and when he refused, she was not after other brothers. Also she did not develop grudge against him which is the sign of lust. She appealed to Kunti to understand the agonies of a woman when bitten by the arrows of Love. Then she explains her extraordinary powers and her capacity to help them in their future endeavors. She talks of the necessity of devising life strategy by dharmic people and she can be a trustful lieutenant. Perhaps Kunti felt the necessity of future help and considered her plea both from dharmic and strategic perspectives.

When everyone agreed for the happy union of Bhima and Hidimba why did they impose two peculiar conditions?

Dharmaraja says, “‘you can roam around with Bhima in day time but you should bring him back by night”.

Bhima says, “I shall be with you till you give birth to a son”.

She agreed for the conditions but the rationality of these conditions merit consideration. There are two opinions for the condition laid down by Dharmaraja. The power of Asuras (demons) grow in nights and he did not want Bhima to be in her company in the nights. Secondly, love making in day time is broadly unacceptable as per our sastras (In fact, our sastras put restrictions on certain days when love-making is absolutely prohibited and they are not discussed here as it is not the subject matter of this story). A son born out of love in broad day light may become a demon. We can see Diti approaching her husband Kashyapa in the fag end of the day and the resultant progeny was daityas (demons). When Parasara approached Matsya Gandhi (later on Satyavati on the ship in the broad day light, she apprehended and by his power of tapas, he made it a dark cloudy night and blessed Ved Vyasa to her. Dharmaraja, perhaps wanted a demonic child capable enough to destroy the demons on the side of Duryodhana in case of any eventuality, and at the same time pious enough to support dharma (Swamy Sundara Chaitanya). Some other people opine that a demonic son conceived in night might not be pious as the ascendency of asuric powers in respect of Hidimba were always suspect.

Why did Bhima put a condition? From the story we know that it was one sided love. Bhima did not want to disown her when she was in all out love towards him. The scriptures say that marriage cannot be reason for lust but for giving birth to children. Bhima precisely did the same thing and he cannot be blamed for deciding to leave her on her giving birth to a child. Further he did not agree for marriage since dharma ordains that the marriage of elder brother should take place first. He agreed only when his brother and mother goaded him to marry Hidimba.

Leaving aside the story, we can glean certain psychological perspectives of Love we encounter in daily life. The tragedy of life for many people is that whom we love will not love us back and whom we don’t love will be after us.

This feeling of infatuation can become all-consuming when the object of our affection doesn’t feel the same way about us- (Alana Palm, 2018)[x]. One more famous anonymous quote goes on to say, ‘Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you and you meant nothing to him’. Of course this observation related to psychology is based on my encounters with the experience of my friends and students; and the readers of the story need not be carried over by these observations since I don’t have any empirical evidence.  

Points to ponder

1.    Does Hindu society viewed sex as taboo?

2.   How do you distinguish dharmic ‘kama’ from that of ‘adharmic kama’?

3.   What are the historical incidents that changed Hindu society from a liberal society of Maha Bharata times to a rigid society by the end of medieval age of history?

My appeal to Readers

I have traced very few references with regard to restriction of sex in day time from our ancient texts. Anybody who has references, please pass on to me over my WhatsApp number 9740287296 or my mail, karanam.rao@gmail.com. 

Similarly all suggestions are welcome. It is our common endeavor to share knowledge and learn our culture in a better fashion.

Footnotes

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[i] This Story is taken from Adi Parva written by sage Ved Vyasa.

[ii] Adi Parva 151.31

[iii] PARIVETTA- It is a Sanskrit word. If an younger marries when the elder one still remained unmarried, the married younger brother is called as PARIVETTA.

[iv] Adi Parva 154.1.

[v] आपादस्तरणे प्राणान् धारयेद् येन तेन वा ।

सर्वमावृत्य कर्तव्यं तं धर्ममनुवर्तता ।। - āpādastaraṇe prāṇān dhārayed yena tena vā । sarvamāvṛtya kartavyaṃ taṃ dharmamanuvartatā ।। Adi Parva 154.13

[vi] - Adi Parva 154.15.

[vii]  (Adi Parva 154.18).

[viii]  (Adi Parva 154.20)

[ix] (Adi Parva 154-35,36).

[x] Alana Palm, 2018, “Why We Love the Ones who Don’t Love Us Back”, https://psiloveyou.xyz/why-we-love-the-ones-who-dont-love-us-back-a217e7323a3a. 

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